Posts

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 This time, I want to write about what I think as a creator of sexual art. Japanese subculture artists—no, not just artists, but subculture enthusiasts in general—tend to be overly bathed in a certain comforting discourse. This discourse suggests that the unique evolutionary path their cultural sphere has taken inherently grants them an advantage in international competition, or that it represents an inimitable strength. Consequently, even though an objective analysis of the current situation reveals that this “uniqueness” actually acts like shackles, restricting the culture's freedom, they start getting angry, convinced that someone else is hindering them and preventing their freedom. This is particularly evident among users of SNS platforms like X, which seem to have usurped the former glory of a once-great platform only to accelerate its decay. Their behavior often makes one suspect they cannot distinguish between “sexual expression” and “non-sexual expression.” This inability t...

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 In most cases, staring at an LCD monitor for extended periods causes eye strain, making it painful even to keep your eyelids open. Drawing isn't something that can be finished in an hour or so; it means working while enduring such discomfort, and while drawing, it becomes difficult to make a sound judgment about whether the picture is truly correct. As is well known, I am a disabled person afflicted by illness, and because I suffer from such health issues, I absolutely cannot tolerate the torment inflicted upon the vulnerable by politics and administration—or to put it more strongly, the eugenic ideology of fascists—that able-bodied people might overlook. To reiterate from last time: I am absolutely not a “genius,” much less a “god.” If anyone were to call me such things... well, someone actually did... that person is dishonest, and I strongly advise you not to believe them. After all, I didn't believe those words either. An honest person would say something like, “I really lo...

2

 Me, pretending to be an artist... well, it's true that a few followers and fans of my work did treat me as one back in the day. Anyway, drawing is the one thing I can barely manage to do that resembles any kind of creative work. Many people paid me for commissions. More often than not, I couldn't deliver work that met their expectations or satisfied me personally. Even when the payment was received and the commission was formally completed, I was left with a lingering sense of guilt and inadequacy as an artist. But if we're talking about whether my work is poor or good, there's no doubt I fall squarely on the poor side of the line dividing all artists. I believe I can't become a truly confident, genuine artist unless I tackle fundamental technical improvements. I should understand pretty well what I need to do for that. So why can't I do it? Why am I progressing so slowly, remaining unskilled? I never trusted the praise people once gave me. I thought they could...

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I am a penniless worker living in Japan who has gained followers by posting sexual artworks—call it pornography if you will—on various platforms. While I occasionally create works that don't fall into that category, either way, this reflects my life experience deeply shaped by the cultural aspects of my love for comics and video games. Searching my name will likely bring up my creations, but if you don't want to see them, absolutely do not look. I also hold political leanings often categorized as liberal. While this label doesn't quite capture me accurately—I'm more precisely left-wing—I often refrain from correcting it because setting these distinctions aside often makes my point clearer. Furthermore, I suffer from a relatively severe mental illness and am officially recognized as disabled. These elements that make up who I am have, therefore, been my suffering for nearly a decade. Because I live in a place like Japan. I suppose I do hate this nation after all. Many fr...